Depressingly Inspiring

I keep meeting people I am jealous of.

I have this horrible problem with life-envy... I want to be these people.
These people are so confident, so adventurous, and have so much love in them.
I won't go into details, but maybe one of these people is reading this right now. Hi. You make me wish I were you. Welcome to this blog that no one reads.

I try so hard to become as confident as these people, but all I end up doing is mimicking the actions they carry out that I find endearing or cool. I can't come up with my own "thing", really. I am failing to progress my writing, and I'm losing interest in art, and I can't put a story together to save my life, and I'm too lazy to learn.
All I really want to do is create things. All kinds of things. But, this is kind of a curse. None of these things will end up being spectacular because my attention will be spread thin across all of them. My artistic attention span is infinitesimal.

I want others to look at me the way I look at the people I envy, if that makes sense. I want to be proud of something I create. I want to make many, many things. And I want it to be dear to someone like, say, Questionable Content or Stranger Than Fiction or Six Feet Under or A Great and Terrible Beauty are to me.

Don't mind me, it's just something I've been thinking of a lot lately, especially since it won't be long til I have to choose in a very definite way what I want to do with my life. Freakin' college, man.

So much love,
Rachel

Alright then.

I know, I know, I'm late again.
I'm in college now, gaiz!! :D And jeez, it's pretty great and even busier than I could have guessed.

My roommate is great! Her name's Caroline, and she's a Lady Gaga/Labyrinth/Office fan. Okay YES.
I've made awesome friends too. Andrea, Dan, Ammar, Derek... you rawkkk. We play video games and dork out on Dungeons and Dragons Online.

I got a part in our all-female cast production of Merchant of Venice!! I get to be Bassanio. Metric crap ton of lines. But hey, I'm so excited!! First practice is on Tuesday! If you're around November 17th-20th, please come check it out. :)
I have joined a couple clubs: Ninjutsu/Self-defense Club, Riff Club (watching bad movies and making fun of them-- last night's was Space Mutiny), and Breakaway (student theatre group).

ALSO!! IMPORTANT! Andrea and I have snagged a spot on the college radio station this Sunday, 8PM-10PM. You can hear us by going on this website and clicking on the iTunes icon up top. Here's hoping it sounds okay!

Classes are pretty cool. Nothing that I can't handle. Psych has a lot of vocab, and we have to read a chapter in our Creative Writing text every two days, but otherwise I love it.

Well I'm gonna go eat breakfast nao, but before I go: HIT ME UP WITH A CHALLENGE THIS MONTH! :) I'll try and complete it before the 30th.

Thank you so much guys. So much love,
Rachel.